AVAST!!

[wwistful]

To whom it may concern,
We've taken liberties with the spoils of your castle but it is not nearly enough to quench our desires for vast riches.
As such, we have taken one of your fine wenches and are holding her hostage.
If somebody does not pay us a handsome fee we shall be setting sail with her on the morrow

Bring all your valuables to our ship or you will never see her again. (Your bodies are an acceptable form of payment. As is booze.)



[[ooc: Murdoc and Dirk are PIRATES for the wish event and Dolores humored them a little too much. Murdoc has wished himself a ship into the lake. It is full of booze.]]

Comments

[wwistful]

There are riches in this world that aren't plated with gold, lad. I'm giving the castle a perfectly open opportunity to be creative with their blessings.

I can think of at least three uses, but I shall hardly be writing them down for you.

[bonafide_divinity]

Three uses? You're a resourceful man, Professor Donoghue. However, with all due respect,[pause] think you should probably know that if your hostage isn't used to a life at sea, they probably won't be able to serve your purposes as well as you would like. And ultimately [inkblot] they'll just end up being dead weight unless [pause]

I have a proposition for you, Professor Donoghue. Release your hostage and I will happily escort you to the kitchens where you will be able to help yourself to anything you would like. That way you won't be needing your hostage [inkblot]</small] in case of emergency.

[wwistful]

I think you're severely misunderestimating me, lad.

Tempting. But no. I have plenty of supplies and I'm sure nothing in the kitchen will prove quite as useful as a healer.

[bonafide_divinity]

Well,

[Damnit, he's at a loss here. Donoghue has a good point. A healer would be useful at sea. How is he going to negotiate around that? He doesn't know anything about hostage negotiations. Let alone hostage negotiations with... pirates? Are they meant to be pirates? They sound like pirates. If only he had some idea of what to do in this situation and oh but he does.

For he is Lord Tulio Garza, one of the finest diplomats Europe has ever seen and an unparalleled master of negotiation, for he is as cunning and loquacious as he is petty. And he is very, very petty.]

Tell me, where is your ship located, Donoghue? I shall be there post haste so that we might discuss this matter in person and I shall come unarmed. I humbly request that you bid me the same courtesy.

[wwistful]

It's made port on the lake, if you wish to visit I have no intention of stopping you. However, I do not promise to adhere to the standards you've set.

[bonafide_divinity]

Well then! I shall make my way to the lake with the greatest of speed and will expect to find you there and your hostage unharmed so that we may discuss this matter like reasonable gentlemen.

[wwistful]

I'll look forward to it.