Eight Sick Beats

[clockspinner]

[Filtered to students]

has anyone else noticed that our robes are long enough we could totally get away with not wearing pants
i have a proposal
no pants tuesday
every tuesday dont wear pants
and since i aint gonna go around checking up your robes just gimme a brofist if you see me on tuesday and youve dropped trou thats cool

go commando if you wish but dont come crying to me if chris hansen has a sit down with you cause peeves indecently exposed you to a firstie

[/filter]

so yeah i know the match was exciting blah blah looks like that toucan from the lion king was wro
but theres a much more important question here
on a scale of one to id hit that like a mack truck going seventy down the interstate with no brakes
crashing headlong into a school bus full of frontier children on their way to the schoolhouse to have their knuckles rapped by mrs wrinklebottom until theyre old enough to go to work in the coal mines and or start popping out babies

how does my broom make my ass look

Comments

[Action]

[clockspinner]

[Dave dodges easily and lobs it right back at him.]

Whoa, watch it Matilda I ain't in the mood for waltzing.

[He motions to John's bed, which is between them both for his safety and theirs.]

Well he sleeps right there, fartface.

[Action]

[candycrabapple]

[Doesn't dodge fast enough and makes an undignified noise as his journal bounces off his head. He rubs his head as he scowls at him.]

Fartface? Really? Didn't we grow out of half-arsed insults like that in first year?

And he can sleep there all he wants because I'm not going to sit on my bed and throw a heavy book at you on yours. Because the gap between our beds is more than two feet, you sunglass wearing knob jockey.

[Action]

[clockspinner]

Then why the hell did you say two feet, shit-tickler? I mean jesus, if you're gonna pick an arbitrary distance from which to throw a tome the size of my head at my head, the least you could do is pick one where you could get a good arm behind it.

Unless you're scared you don't have the strength.

[Action]

[candycrabapple]

Because at two feet I don't have to let go and it's more like trying to beat you to death with a book than it is actually throwing it at you.

Besides I picked two feet because if I let go of the book it's going to hit you because noone, not even I can miss at two minuscule fucking feet, that's fucking why I picked it, shit-sailor.

[Action]

[clockspinner]

I bet I could dodge a book thrown at two feet.

I also bet you couldn't hit me with a book at ten feet, even if I didn't move a muscle.

[Action]

[candycrabapple]

yeah, because you're just that good, what a load of shit. The only thing you're good at is being a raging douche braggart, that's all.

We aren't talking about hitting you with a book at ten feet away, which I could so easily do if it was you, we're talking about two feet. Don't try and side track my point here.

[Action]

[clockspinner]

Ah, but I am, in fact, that good. I've trained under more mountain waterfalls than you could even name. Bro got his training dodging buckshot in the Appalachian mountains. Striders are bred for speed. I had an older brother but he was thrown off a mountain and exposed like the Spartans because he wasn't fast enough to make the cut.

My point is why the hell two feet. And why didn't you just say 'beat you with a book' if that was what you were actually fucking talking about? Are you trying to make negative sense? Because if so, then four for you Glen Coco.

[Action]

[candycrabapple]

Strider. You couldn't talk more shit if you lived on a diet purely consisting of laxatives and prunes.

I just picked it because I know at two feet I could never miss you!