Monkey Slut - what's the chances of that coming up in a normal conversation?

[smackmybitchup]

 So it's that time of year again where I have to say sadly there is only one of me ladies, so don't get your hopes too high up thinking that I'm going to ask you to the ball. If I could please everyone, I would. But sometimes you have to make sacrifices. Possible sacrifices include multiple female dates to the ball.





Are the rumours true? Is Wrinklefucker really leaving? Has he left? Wrinklefucker I will miss you dearly. You'll forever have a place in my heart!

Comments

[smackmybitchup]

i can polish all night.

[quasistellar]

Do you want the rest of Slytherin to dislike you for losing all the points they've gained for winning in Quidditch? Because you're going down that road awfully fast, Mr Young.

[smackmybitchup]

We won in Quidditch?

[quasistellar]

Yes. Slytherin did win. And you're well on the way to losing all the points the house gained for it in one fell swoop. That's not something to take pride in.

[smackmybitchup]

I'm sort of a glass half full, balls attached, all the hair on my head sort of guy. if i do something spectacular i'm not going to put myself down for it.

[quasistellar]

Fifty more points from Slytherin: twenty-five from hitting on Miss Zanotto after she told you to stop bothering her, and another twenty-five from hitting on Professor Vargas.

That's seventy-five down already, plus a month's detention cleaning in the Great Hall.

And I'll be telling the school about this, so that no one takes this as an example.

[smackmybitchup]

I'm not a paedophile! I was not hitting on her! This is discrimination!

What do you have against the Irish?!

[quasistellar]

You'll be serving all of that detention under the watchful eyes of Slytherin's house ghost, the Bloody Baron. Talk to him about discrimination.

And if you try to tell me I have a problem with discrimination against anyone of Irish descent at this school, Mr Young, considering my daughters are half-Irish, then you'll be scrubbing lavatories every weekend for the rest of the school year. Is that clear?