TWELVE ♋

[selfhatred]

[filtered from Equius]

IF ZAHHAK ASKS IF YOU'VE SEEN ME, YOU HAVEN'T.
SERIOUSLY, MY LIFE IS ON THE LINE HERE.
I MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE TOLD HIM TO READ 50 SHADES OF GRAY.
AND THEN LENT HIM MY COPY.
WITHOUT TELLING HIM THE REAL PREMISE.
BUT SERIOUSLY.
YOU DIDN'T SEE ANYTHING.

Comments

[selfhatred]

THAT WAS MORE INFORMATION THAN WHAT I NEEDED TO KNOW, STARK.
THANK YOU FOR THE LOVELY MENTAL IMAGE.
BUT WHILE I HAVE YOU HERE
YOU'RE, UH, GOOD WITH POTIONS AND SHIT, RIGHT?

[arrogantalloy]

Well, information is knowledge, knowledge is power. So you're welcome.

And thanks for thinking I'm a lovely mental image. Really, it warms my heart.

If by good you mean in the top 5% yeah I guess, sure. Why?

[selfhatred]

AS MUCH AS IT PAINS ME TO SAY IT, I NEED TUTORING.
MY POTIONS EXAM WASN'T REALLY...ALL THAT GOOD LAST YEAR.

[1/2]

[arrogantalloy]

Not that I had to do third year potions with all that year skipping I did or anything. But what, were you asleep during it?

I mean sure, it's not as intuitive as Charms. But I can't even cook and I can pass this.

But you know what? Sure, I'll tutor you. Shouldn't be too hard. And I wont even charge you for it.

[2/2]

[arrogantalloy]

Actually.

Bring blueberries. Or strawberries.

Well any kind of fruit really.

Chocolate is also okay.

[selfhatred]

I DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE FOR POTIONS, BUT I KINDA NEED IT TO PASS FIFTH YEAR SO I GUESS GETTING A HEAD START IS GOOD ENOUGH.
RIGHT, FRUIT OR CHOCOLATE. YOU GOT A DEAL.

[arrogantalloy]

As a neutral party here. What do you have patience for?

Adding the two, could result in betting tutoring. Just putting that out there, because really. You're getting high enough quality tutoring as is is.

[selfhatred]

CHARMS AND TRANSFIGURATION ARE MY BEST CLASSES.

WELL CHOCOLATE AND STRAWBERRIES ARE NATURAL APHRODISIACS AND BLUEBERRIES ARE GOOD FOR YOUR HEALTH, SO I GUESS YOU'RE BENEFITING FROM ALL THREE.
...DON'T ASK ME HOW I KNOW THAT.

[arrogantalloy]

Yeah, not surprised somehow.

really, if anyone else had said that to me. I'd think they were trying to come on to me. Good thing it's you.

[selfhatred]

YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY TYPE, STARK.
JUST SO YOU KNOW.

[arrogantalloy]

I'm everyone's type. Just so you're corrected.

[selfhatred]

WHATEVER YOU SAY.

[He'd say something about arrogance being ugly, but he just got himself a tutor. He's not going to screw up again this evening.]

[arrogantalloy]

It's not me saying it. It was Time Life Magazine.

[Tony would only turn it back on him somehow. Because really, Karkat's signed up for being antagonised while learning more than he probably needs to to pass.]

[selfhatred]

I DON'T READ TIME LIFE MAGAZINE, SORRY.
YOU'LL HAVE TO TRY AND IMPRESS SOMEONE ELSE.

[Plus he's going to be beaten up and/or otherwise after this. I think he's going to suffer enough.]

[arrogantalloy]

Please, I impress people on a daily basis just for being the son of a multi-billion dollar genius philanthropist, who shows signs of over taking the shadow cast. Like impressing you is high on my to do list.

And besides. I must impress you, otherwise why would you ask me to be your tutor while hiding in a box from Zahhak?

[selfhatred]

WELL YOU'RE ABOUT THE ONLY PERSON I REMEMBER OFFHAND BEING GOOD WITH POTIONS.
AND IT'S REALLY MORE OF A CASE OF GRABBING YOUR ATTENTION WHILE I'VE GOT IT.

[arrogantalloy]

See. I'm memorable.

[selfhatred]

[And there goes his ink as he scrambles to get up and move. You won't be hearing from him for a while, Tony.]