It's important to you, ain't it? [Gamzee asks, looking down at the other boy.] I mean, this shit really matters to you, right? Ain't that why you be all up and working so hard at it?
Well...yeah it matters to me. [He draws his legs up to his chest, setting his feet on the edge of his chair before leaning forward into them.] But Maka's right. Life's not a fucking romcom so I shouldn't be trying so fucking hard to make it like one.
I dunno. I guess I just don't think it's some bad thing to want people to be happy and find love and all that shit. And try and help 'em do it. That ain't be all like in movie land, that shit be real. Love, I mean.
[kisses the top of Karkat's head with a faint smile]
[raises an eyebrow] I motherfuckin' guess? I mean, you have yourself some pretty sweet ass friends, you ain't failing or getting kicked off of nothing, and ain't nobody dying around you, right? I mean, if you're judging whatever the fuck this fail is on by sometimes a sister getting pissed at you, pretty sure that's motherfuckin' life, bro. You got prospects, and that's more than a lot of motherfuckers can say.
[Sometimes he has trouble deciphering what the other boy says, and what he said was really a callback to the mini feelings jam they had near the lake when it was frozen over. Still, he purses his lips together a bit, tilting his head down.]
[Gamzees brows draw down, and he loops his arms tighter around the other boy.] I know you ain't all meaning to spit in the face of everyone who calls themselves your friend. Because I know you're a motherfuckin' stand up dude.
[He loosens a hand for long enough to tilt Karkat's chin up to look at him.] But it's kinda hard to take when you're talking like all these motherfuckin' friendships ain't shit, because you're such a fuck-up. Is a brother gonna have to get all frontwise at you? Because I'm down with the salty rudeness, if that's what it takes to get you to figure out you ain't the motherfuckin' asshole of the universe.
[He lets Gamzee move his head, looking up at the other boy with his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Maybe he was sulking a bit about things that hadn't happened yet, but that was his coping mechanism. He glances away from the taller Slytherin, lips setting themselves into a thin line.]
Maybe I'm being a fucking retard. I'm worrying about shit that hasn't even happened.
Yeah, you kinda are. [Agrees, frankly, but gently.] And ain't shit all gonna happen unless you tell this sweet chica you like her. And I mean the good shit. Damn, brother, is it really better to stay all quiet like and for sure get nothin', watching other dudes mack on your lady, then actually say some upfront words to her face that she probably actually wants to hear?
[Karkat pauses, thinking about what Eridan said about trying to get her attention. Frankly he thought there was no way in hell Jade would date someone like him, but there was every possibility she might.]
You're right. I wouldn't forgive myself, and I'd just bury myself in a deeper hole.
Ex-motherfuckin'-actly. [leans forward to press his forehead to Karkat's] See, all you gotta do is tell her you all up and got motherfuckin' feelings for her and then take her out and do your romance thing, and you'll get all the sloppy make-outs, brother. Like the miracle of kisses all over the motherfuckin' place.
[ ... man, Gamzee wishes it had worked like that for him.]
[He glanced up at the other when he pressed their foreheads together, eyes a bit tired and weary with everything that had happened lately.]
I don't think we'll be doing sloppy makeouts until later. I...kind of want to wait until she's comfortable for that. [Karkat glances to the side.] That's kind of lame I know.
You wanna practice, bro? [The offer is off-handed, casual. Like it's no big deal at all, something bros do, like letting a friend practice charms on another.]
[Off-handed or not, it makes Karkat blanch a little. Then again, this was Gamzee he was talking to. Biting his lower lip, the smaller boy weighed the pros and cons of kissing his friend.]
Brilliant. [ ... oh, wow, Gamzee's never actually kissed anyone before. No one ever takes him up on his offers. Oh, shit. Well, the Slytherin's not dumb enough to just grab Karkat right here and start sucking face, though his heart does beat a little faster at the thought.] Uh, where?
[Okay, this was probably going to be the dumbest thing he'd ever done. When he asks him where, Karkat takes a moment to realize what he means, silently grateful the other hadn't just grabbed his head and gone for it. The Gryffindor taps his chin, trying to think of any empty classrooms or anything nearby.]
[Yeah, this definitely wasn't the smartest idea he'd ever had but he needed to do something about his lack of experience, and hell if the other was willing then... Karkat hesitated for a moment before reaching up to take hold of Gamzee's hand, noticing how much bigger it was than his own. He manages to find his voice, even though he was just trying to reassure himself that this was what he wanted to do.]
[Gamzee won't let go of Karkat's hand unless the smaller boy pulls away himself - it's really no wonder that Jade thinks they have something going on. The Slytherin is always touching, as much as he's allowed, as though he's starved for it. In a way, he is - he's never gotten much touch, from anyone, and he's the kind of boy who thrives and soaks up any little affection.
The bathroom's not far, and once they're inside Gamzee grabs the rubbish bin and jams it up under the door handle, so if someone tries to come in, they'll have to force their way past that.]
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[kisses the top of Karkat's head with a faint smile]
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I guess. I've never been in a relationship though, so how the fuck do I know I'm not just screwing things up for everyone involved? Like I always do?
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[He gives a sigh.]
I always do.
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I guess so.
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[He loosens a hand for long enough to tilt Karkat's chin up to look at him.] But it's kinda hard to take when you're talking like all these motherfuckin' friendships ain't shit, because you're such a fuck-up. Is a brother gonna have to get all frontwise at you? Because I'm down with the salty rudeness, if that's what it takes to get you to figure out you ain't the motherfuckin' asshole of the universe.
whoops somehow I thought I'd replied to this
Maybe I'm being a fucking retard. I'm worrying about shit that hasn't even happened.
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You're right. I wouldn't forgive myself, and I'd just bury myself in a deeper hole.
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[ ... man, Gamzee wishes it had worked like that for him.]
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I don't think we'll be doing sloppy makeouts until later. I...kind of want to wait until she's comfortable for that. [Karkat glances to the side.] That's kind of lame I know.
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[He was thirteen and he wasn't exactly a people person. Hell, Jade would be his first girlfriend if he went through with it.]
Sure I've seen it a lot in films but I've never done it.
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...Sure.
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There's the bathroom just down the hall.
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Karkat hesitated for a moment before reaching up to take hold of Gamzee's hand, noticing how much bigger it was than his own. He manages to find his voice, even though he was just trying to reassure himself that this was what he wanted to do.]
Yeah. Yeah, sure, let's do this.
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The bathroom's not far, and once they're inside Gamzee grabs the rubbish bin and jams it up under the door handle, so if someone tries to come in, they'll have to force their way past that.]
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