2nd ♋

[candycrabapple]

WELL I'M GETTING THIS OUT OF THE WAY FIRST BECAUSE IT'S THE NOT IMPORTANT PART OF THIS WHOLE ENTRY.

IT'S PROBABLY A GOOD THING NO ONE DIED OR WAS HORRIBLE INJURED OVER THE WINTER BREAK, EVEN THOUGH A FEW OF YOU DESERVED IT DUE TO OVERWHELMING STUPIDITY ON A SCALE THAT NOT EVEN THE DINOSAURS COULD COMPREHEND.

NOW, CAN WE GET TO THE POINT NOW THAT THOSE SENTIMENTS HAVE BEEN POSTED AND OBSERVED? WELL I'M MOVING ON ANYWAY.

BECAUSE IT'S MORE THAN A LITTLE OBVIOUS THAT *EVERYONE* HERE IS A SLAVE TO THEIR MOST PRIMAL AND POWERFUL URGES, AND PROBABLY SCREWING THINGS UP, I AM GOING TO BE OVERWHELMINGLY GENEROUS TO THE SCHOOL AND OFFER MY SERVICES. I AM SOMETHING OF A ROMANCE MASTER, I CARRY SUCH SKILL THAT THAT IF YOU WERE EVER TO SEE ME AT FULL FORCE YOUR EYES WOULD SHOOT OUT OF YOUR HEAD AND YOUR JAW WOULD DISLOCATE IN SHOCK AND AWE OF ME.

SO, IF ANYONE IS HAVING ANY RELATIONSHIP TROUBLES, COME TO ME AND I'LL HELP YOU KEEP YOUR DATE OR EVEN HELP YOU GET AROUND TO ACTUALLY TELLING SOMEONE YOU ACTUALLY LIKE THEM INSTEAD OF JUST MOONING OVER THEM FROM A DISTANCE LIKE THE SADDEST AND UGLIEST PUPPY IN THE STORE THAT WAS NEVER BOUGHT.

Comments

[candycrabapple]

YEAH, THAT WHAT SO BEYOND A MASSIVE CLUSTER FUCK OF EVENTS. AND STUPIDLY SUDDEN, OF COURSE IT WAS DOOMED TO FAIL.

[mo_cara]

He SeEmS lIkE hE wOuLd Be OkAy To MaRrY.
bEtTeR tHaN pRoFeSsOr MaTtErIs, aNyWaY.

[candycrabapple]

CONSIDERING HER ATTITUDE TO MOST THINGS THE FACT SHE IS A MARVEL TO SOCIO-PSYCHOLOGISTS THE WORLD OVER.

EVEN IF MOST OF THE TEACHERS HERE ARE A PAIN IN THE ASS, CONSIDERING HE HAS TO PUT UP WITH HAVING A GENETIC CONNECTION TO ERIDAN AND CRONUS, HE NEED'S SOMEONE TO LOOK AFTER HIM FOR A FUCKING CHANGE.

[mo_cara]

ErIdAn'S pReTtY aLl RiGhT.
i ThInK hE mIgHt Be A hOmO, tHoUgH, kInDa LiKe Me ExCePt He'S aLl HaViNg A tHiNg FoR cApToR.

[candycrabapple]

ERIDIAN IS A DIPSHIT OF EMPIRICAL PROPORTIONS.
WHO GIVES A SHIT WHO HE HAS OR HASN'T GOT A THING FOR. HIS BIG MOUTH AND HOLIER-THAN-THOUGH ACTIONS ARE ALWAYS GOING TO SCREW IT THE FUCK UP. BECAUSE HE STILL DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THAT BEING A JACKASS DOESN'T WORK AS A FLIRTING STRATEGY.

[mo_cara]

hAvInG a BiG mOuTh MiGhT bE pReTtY gOoD dEpEnDiNg On WhO a BrOtHeR wAnTs To GeT bUsY wItH.
;o)

[candycrabapple]

THERE ARE TIME I WONDER IF THE AMOUNT OF SEXUAL THOUGHTS YOU HAVE ARE HEALTHY OR JUST INSANELY OVER ZEALOUS.

[mo_cara]

YeAh, I tRiEd To AsK aBoUt ThAt, BuT tHeN i GoT dEtEnTiOn FoR a MoNtH.
:o(

[candycrabapple]

YOU SAY THAT LIKE I WASN'T THE ONE WHO HAD TO SIT AROUND WAITING FOR YOUR DETENTIONS TO FINISH SO YOU WOULDN'T END UP DOING SOMETHING UNNATURALLY POINTLESS, CAUSING YOU TO END UP WITH EVEN MORE DETENTION. THAT MEANS I WOULD HAVE TO WAIT BEHIND FOR EVEN LONGER WHICH BELIEVE ME WOULD HAVE PISSED ME OFF MORE THAN YOU WOULD HAVE EVER TRIED TO IMAGINE.

[mo_cara]

I dOn'T eVeN tRy ImAgInInG ThAt ShIt No MoRe.
;o)

[candycrabapple]

THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'VE DEVELOPED INTO AN UNCARING JACKASS FROM ALL THOSE DETENTIONS, THAT'S WHY YOU DON'T EVEN TRY ANY MORE, YOU UNFLAPPABLE SHIT.

[mo_cara]

NaH, bRo, I cAn StIlL gEt My FlAp On PrEtTy GoOd!

[candycrabapple]

WOW, MY HEART SOARS WITH YOUR ABILITY THAT YOU STILL, ON OCCASION CAN STILL GET YOUR FLAP ON. MY FEARS ARE NOW ABATED BECAUSE I WAS SO WORRIES YOU MIGHT HAVE TO GET A FLAP-ECTOMY.

YOU PISS ME OFF SO MUCH.

[mo_cara]

yEaH, bUt YoU gOt LoVe In YoUr PuMp BiScUiT fOr Me, AnyWaY.
;o)

[candycrabapple]

DEPENDING ON THE DAY THAT IS THE MOST HOTLY CONTESTED STATEMENT THAT COULD EVER BE CONTESTED IN THE HISTORY OF DEBATABLE TOPICS.

BUT I GUESS I CAN BEGRUDGINGLY ADMIT THAT THERE ARE TIMES WHEN YOU'RE LESS OF A PAIN IN MY PALE ARSE THAN NORMAL.

[mo_cara]

WeLl, YeAh, BrO, cAuSe We AiN't LiKiNg EaCh OtHeR lIkE tHaT.

[candycrabapple]

EAT SHIT AND DIE, YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT HOW I FUCKING MEANT IT. YOU MAKE MY SPLEEN WANT TO CLIMB OUT OF MY BODY AND STRANGLE ME FOR PUTTING UP WITH YOU.

[mo_cara]

wOaH, sPlEeNs HaVe HaNdS?
mOtHeRfUcKiN mIrAcLeS!

[candycrabapple]

HERE'S AN IDEA. FUCK YOU. HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

[mo_cara]

SoUnDs MiGhTy FiNe, BeSt FrIeNd!
;o)

[candycrabapple]

[He just glares and swears at the journal as if that would make himself clear to Gamzee and his stupid comments.]