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[savviest]

Hogwarts!
Now that we've returned both from our holidays and from our graceful plummet into the past and future, I feel that we are overdue for some introductions.

We shall begin with the best one! Here I am, Professor Jack Sparrow! The charmingest of charm teachers with multiple talents in various areas. My enjoyments include rum, wine and scotch on occasion.

I was severely tempted to greet all of your smiling faces with an essay, but that would require setting one. Instead, I ask that you step forward, introduce yourself and tell me ONE thing that you are supposedly good at so I'll know if you'll be of any use in the future I can get to know you!

Comments

[candycrabapple]

WELL THERE'S A VERY VAGUE IF CORRECT BY DEFAULT STATEMENT. WHAT AN AMAZING WAY TO MAKE A STUDENT FEEL LIKE HE'S LISTENED TO WITHOUT ACTUALLY HAVING TO GO THROUGH THE TROUBLE OF READING ANYTHING HE HAS TO SAY. YOU WOULD BECOME MY NEW FAVOURITE TEACHER BECAUSE OF THIS, HOWEVER I HAVE A TENDENCY TO LIKE TEACHERS BASED ON THEIR ABILITY TO PRETEND TO GIVE A SHIT.

SO YOU CAN GO TO ALL THE TROUBLE OF KEEPING THAT SO OBVIOUSLY PATRONISING CONGRATULATIONS TOO, BECAUSE I DON'T WANT IT.

[savviest]

Yes! Thank you! I try.

[candycrabapple]

YOU'RE NOT MEANT TO BE PROUD OF SOMETHING LIKE THAT? WHAT KIND OF TEACHER IS PROUD OF THAT YOU SHOULD BE MAKING US FEEL LIKE VIABLE MEMBERS OF SOCIETY NOT BRAIN-DEAD PETS, THAT WILL NEVER MAKE IT IN THE WORLD. HOW DID YOU EVEN GET THE JOB?!

[savviest]

You're a good lad, I know. But I shan't be giving you points today. Don't you have studies to attend to, boy?