002

[savviest]

Hogwarts!
Now that we've returned both from our holidays and from our graceful plummet into the past and future, I feel that we are overdue for some introductions.

We shall begin with the best one! Here I am, Professor Jack Sparrow! The charmingest of charm teachers with multiple talents in various areas. My enjoyments include rum, wine and scotch on occasion.

I was severely tempted to greet all of your smiling faces with an essay, but that would require setting one. Instead, I ask that you step forward, introduce yourself and tell me ONE thing that you are supposedly good at so I'll know if you'll be of any use in the future I can get to know you!

Comments

[candycrabapple]

WOW, SO IS THIS IN MEANT TO BE IN PLACE OF THOSE RIDICULOUS "HI! MY NAME IS..." STICKERS? BECAUSE AS LESS EMBARRASSING AS THIS IS, IT'S STILL PRETTY FOCUS GROUP IF YOU ASK ME.

BUT, I'M A STUDENT, YOU'RE A TEACHER. SO I GUESS I BETTER TELL YOU THAT I'M A GRYFFINDOR FOURTH YEAR, KARKAT VANTAS. AND I ACTUALLY AM GOOD AT UNDERSTANDING PEOPLE, EVEN IF I DON'T ACTIVELY GIVE EVEN HALF A SHIT ABOUT THEM.

[bundangos]

NICE TO MEET YOU PROFESSOR!!

I'm Usagi Tsukino and I get really good grades in charms and transfiguration!!!

I hope you like it here, I'm muggle-born but I really love it here.

[arrogantalloy]

Really, scotch should be the only thing worth mentioning out of those two enjoyments.

[cantstarvethisfire]

Katniss Everdeen, and I have good aim.

[mo_cara]

My HaNdLe Be GaMzEe MaKaRa, AnD i'M wIcKeD gOoD aT gEtTiNg My AsS iN dEtEnTiOn!

[wiggin]

[see, this is why he doesn't like Charms...other than it's boring.]

You don't seem like much of a teacher, Professor.

[marshall_lee]

I'm Marshall Lee, Fifth year Slytherin and I'm fanfreakingtastic at playing guitar and singing.
[Filtered to Jack only]
I'm also a vampire but only you Professor types should know about that.
[/Filter]

[allamericanreject]

Hey professor! I'm Alfred Jones, resident hero and sixth year Gryffindor of this awesome school! I really appreciate ya not givin us an essay! thanks!

uhh i'm good at charms! That's something! and if you ever need to know anything about muggle life I'm pretty knowlegeable bout that too!

[Duh, muggleborn.]

[littlefairybull]

hELLO, pROFESSOR,
mY NAME IS TAVROS AND i AM A HUFFLEPUFF,
aND, uH,
i AM GOOD AT GAMES AND PUZZLES,

[savviest]

That's an interesting name? Is it from Minsk? Sounds Minsk..ish.

You know what they say about boys who are good at games and puzzles, lad?

[savviest]

Hero, eh? Where were you when everyone had boogies flying out their nose and couldn't take two steps without falling over and sobbing?

I appreciate not having to mark one. For now.

Charms are the zest of the magical life! However, I am already well versed in the way of muggles, lad.

[savviest]

Fanfreakingtastic, you say? I'll have to take your...long and...interesting word for it!

[Filtered.]
Stupendous! What on earth are you doing here?
[/Filetered.]

[savviest]

Is it because of my youthful energy? Is that what it is?

Neither do you, come to think of it.

[savviest]

Is that something I should be keeping in mind, Mister Maraka?

[savviest]

Greetings!

I should hope you won't be using your magificent powers to lob bits of paper or your desk at me.

[savviest]

I like to appear as if I have varied interests.

But you're wrong, mate. Rum is a man's best friend.

Not that you'd know that, of course.

[savviest]

That's an interesting name you've got there. Where'd you get that one from?

Charms, eh? That's what I like to hear.

[savviest]

I didn't read a word of that, so I'm going to assume you're good at writing big.

Congratulations!

[mo_cara]

I gUeSs, So It DoN't Be CaTcHiNg YoU bY sUrPrIsE nOnE wHeN i F*** SoMeThInG uP?

[littlefairybull]

iT'S, uH, gREEK ACTUALLY, eVEN THOUGH i AM NOT GREEK,

aND NO i DO NOT KNOW, wHAT THEY SAY ABOUT THAT,

[marshall_lee]

I'd be happy to play for you sometime.

[Filtered]
Let's just say I needed a place to lie low for a while. That and I never graduated when I was alive.
[/filtered]

[allamericanreject]

Um well i was dealin with my boyfriend bein like way older than me? you know stuff like that. also i think i was kinda depressed at the time. it was pretty lame.

Oh. Huh. Im also good at other things but theyre not useful skills around here I dont think. :( Mostly just videogames and stuff.

[bundangos]

I got it from Momma?? Papa too I guess?

I LOVE it it's really super fun and I pretty much never mess up in it!

[arrogantalloy]

No, yeah. Sure. What would a rich American kid know about easily obtainable alcohol. Hmm.

I can still know what it's like even if I'm not meant to have it. I mean Rum

smells so.

So cheap really.

[candycrabapple]

WELL THERE'S A VERY VAGUE IF CORRECT BY DEFAULT STATEMENT. WHAT AN AMAZING WAY TO MAKE A STUDENT FEEL LIKE HE'S LISTENED TO WITHOUT ACTUALLY HAVING TO GO THROUGH THE TROUBLE OF READING ANYTHING HE HAS TO SAY. YOU WOULD BECOME MY NEW FAVOURITE TEACHER BECAUSE OF THIS, HOWEVER I HAVE A TENDENCY TO LIKE TEACHERS BASED ON THEIR ABILITY TO PRETEND TO GIVE A SHIT.

SO YOU CAN GO TO ALL THE TROUBLE OF KEEPING THAT SO OBVIOUSLY PATRONISING CONGRATULATIONS TOO, BECAUSE I DON'T WANT IT.