14 Smuppets

[plushaeusrumpified]

So. I'm not sure exactly how this happened, but somehow Dumbledore decided that I'm suitable for the position of HoH for Gryffindor.

[He's... quite honestly pretty damn shocked by this. He never expected to be entrusted with such a huge responsibility, and... Well. He considers it a huge honor. Gryffindor is important to him, even if it's for stupid reasons. Even if he had to argue in order to get put in Gryffindor, back when he was in school. But even more than the simply fact he values Gryffindor traits, the simple act of being given so much responsibility means a lot to him, because it shows that Dumbledore has seen how much he's changed. He's been trying to do better lately, and it honestly feels like all of his effort has paid off. He's determined to not let him down.]

So yeah, I guess that's... that. I'm not really sure what to say, but I have to say; it's an honor. I'm going to take this position seriously, so anyone who thinks this means Gryffindor is going to be able to slack off has another thing coming to them.

But with that said, you ever need anything don't hesitate to ask, got it? I was given this for a reason, which means you can trust me with stuff. I'm here for you guys. In fact, I might as well go ahead and say you're all part of the Strider family now, now that I'm the Head of House. Who knows, maybe I'll even hand out shades.

[The next bit is filtered away from Murdoc.]

By the way, tomorrow ain't just V-day. It's also Professor Donoghue's birthday, so be sure to wish him a happy birthday. Maybe give him an apple or somethin'. Whatever floats your boat.

You're also all invited to my office for a surprise party tomorrow, around 8 PM. If you guys don't come, I'm gonna be real disappointed.

Comments

[toocoolforthis]

I know you're perfectly capable of being sincere and a smartass at the same time.
You can't fool me. [Except when he can, but they don't talk about that.]

[Filtered]

Give me some fucking credit. I can handle my own shit.

[plushaeusrumpified]

[Filtered]

I'm just saying, you'd be so much better off if you'd let me help. With me, there would be 0% chance of any pussy in your future, robotic or otherwise.

[Filtered]

[toocoolforthis]

First of all, robotic pussy is not even a thing that exists in a refined form. Second of all, there is like a 2% chance of there being any in my future anyway.
I'm a strong, independent young woman, Bro. I don't need your help.

[Filtered]

[plushaeusrumpified]

A 2% chance chance is still alarmingly high. But I had no fucking idea you were a woman, dude. When did that happen? You get a sex change when you were off being Miss Independent? Should've told me sooner, I feel a little betrayed.

[Filtered]

[toocoolforthis]

There is a .0002% chance of it interacting with me in any way. Is that a more comfortable statistic for you?
I thought you would notice before I had to say anything.

[Filtered]

[plushaeusrumpified]

Yeeeah, I guess them statistics are way better. Not that I really care that much about the chances of you interacting with pussy.

They must be hiding, it's the only explanation I have for not noticing.