sortinghat_rp

Finally, I'm going to get to go to Diagon Alley. It's just a matter of hours.
I could offer an estimation of how many hours it is until this happens, but the majority of that estimation depends upon when my uncle actually decides to wake up.
Personally, I don't think I'll be sleeping at all. I've heard so many fascinating things about the place, so I'm thrilled to actually be able to visit.
The concept that such a place could have existed under my nose for all these years is astounding, but it makes sense, considering it's a wizard place and I didn't know a thing about it until I got my letter.
I'm to get my wand too, and this is this most significant thing that's on the agenda, because seriously?
Clothes shopping is boring, and as much as I enjoy books, I've gone book shopping before.
Never have I bought a cauldron, but that is beside the point.
I've been reading about them too, how the properties of each wand are significant and unique.
It makes me even more anxious to find out what my wand will be like, considering the wood and core are supposed to be telling about the type of person I am.
Or something along the lines of that.
There's supposed to be other things going on too, but I don't really know details on it. The whole wand thing definitely out-shadows it.
Who is going to Diagon Alley soon anyway? Maybe we'll see each other.
If you don't know what I look like, I'll probably be the kid with Dave.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Go to sleep, Dirk.

[kicking your mattress real hard rn little cuz]

I'm not even doing anything to bother you.
Quit kicking my mattress. I definitely can't sleep if you do that.

...

You must be new.
Your pen scratching sounds louder than the hopes and dreams of millions of endangered species being crushed mercilessly under the bloody blades of a greedy corporate cashmonger's rainforest deforestation project.

[One final kick, right under Dirk's ass.]

Oh my god Dave stop. You're going to wake Roxy up.
You're acting like a baby right now, except babies could actually sleep through this. You're worse. You're like a fetus that everyone really just thinks is indigestion.
Seriously I'm going to tell Uncle Dirk if you don't.

[He pitches a falsetto up into his nose.]
Please, Dirk, stop scratching your pen like you're trying to rape my eardrums with a cat dick! I'm offended! My family was murdered in a rainforest, you insensitive little shit!

_{[He assumes a really whiny tone, because why not.]}

Oh you poor thing! Here, talk to my friend Mr. Dodo. Oh wait, he's dead. Shut up.

You're ignoring my triggers! I'm gonna write about this in my blog!

Oh no! Do we have a social justice warrior on our hands, Cal? Now the whole internet is going to know what a cruel, insensitive person I am!

_{[Oh hey, there's a smuppet on his bed. Guess what's getting chucked to the bottom bunk.]}

[The ensuing little girl scream is genuine, and then there's a pillow being swung at any part of Dirk that Dave can reach, regardless of Thing Two also sleeping next to him.]

_{[The scream that follows sounds like a six year old girl is being murdered in a dark alley way or something. A boy's voice shouldn't be that high pitched, regardless of age. He flails and tries to whack the pillow away.]}

What the fuck are you fuckers doing?!

[SOME OF US ARE TRYING TO SLEEP, ASSHOLES.]

[So Bro is a light sleeper at the best of times. Considering everything going on lately, the first scream was more than enough to wake him up. The second scream was enough to send him over the edge of paranoia. Roxy's just fueled the fire even more.

He's got his katana in hand and literally kicks the bedroom door down before flashstepping in. Considering the fact he's just woken up, he's in nothing but his boxers and his bedhead is wild and free. And congratulations, he was even so worried that he forgot to put on his shades.]

You better get the fuck out of my house or I'll wreck your shit!

[Dave froze, the pillow slipping from numb fingers as all of the colour drained from his face. If Bro's posture alone wasn't enough to remind him of that night on the astronomy tower, the burning anger in Bro's eyes brought it crashing back into him 90 miles an hour.]

...Bro?

_{[As if Dirk can't possibly act more like a little girl, the abrupt outburst from Bro is enough to get a squeak out of him. Between Roxy and Bro, wow he kinda feels bad.]}

Please don't kill us.

[Half asleep Roxy + terrifying man busting in with a sword = a screeching Roxy hugging Dirk's face.]

[It's safe to say he's... not prepared for everyone's reactions. Or the fact there isn't some kind of burglar terrorizing them. Most of all he's not prepared for the look in Dave's eyes when he looks over at him. It...it's a look he hasn't seen in months. It's a loot he hasn't ever wanted to see again.

The katana falls to the floor as it slides out of his hand.

Under normal circumstances, he'd probably have laughed at Dirk and Roxy's reactions, but he's focused mainly on Dave.]

...I'm sorry. I thought somebody'd broken in or something. I didn't mean to scare you...

[While it sounds like he's talking to all of them, his eyes are directly on Dave and they're full of regret, his voice full of remorse.]

[As soon as possible, he regains control over his emotions and sets his mouth in a stubborn line.]

Wow, rude, you think Dirk and I couldn't take any baddies who came crawlin' through our window trying to snatch our people up?

_{[He holds Roxy close because wow, does he hate it when she's scared.]}

We could totally take then...

[She's not shaking. Absolutely, totally not shaking, nope.]

Me too.

Yeah, exactly. _{[Does petting her hair help? Because that's what he's doing now to try to soothe her.]}

[Yeah, Dave... You're not fooling him at all. But because they aren't alone and to preserve Dave's dignity, he... Won't push it. But he does try and shoot Dave a real, genuine look of apology before attempting to put on his own pokerface. It's hard, but he at least manages a slightly passive expression.]

Well then next time, I'll leave the burglar catching to all of you.

[He opens his mouth to ask who the hell screamed, but... Decides against that. He has an idea.]

So what did attack?

_{[Dirk isn't a baby. He's not a chicken. He's not going to admit they screamed over pillows. Or at least, that's what he screamed over.]}

I think there might've been a ghost in here.

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