001

[savviest]

If you will allow an old man to regale you with a tale of his youth, I should like to inform you all that when I was a student here we had to FIT into our robes to be accepted. What has the education system come to, I ask! I thought I'd be professoring...professing? Not nannying!
Is it too late to call shenanigans? I'm calling shenanigans. I resign. I quit.

I'll be in my office if anyone over the wise age of eleven has anything of worth to mention.

Comments

[tiniestcaptain]

Do you always talk to yourself like this, sir?

[savviest]

Frequently! One day you will learn that one's greatest audience is one's self! If only because people never start caring about a thing you say unless it involves money or booze in some way, shape or form.

...You aren't one of the wee ones, are you?

[tiniestcaptain]

What does wee mean, sir? I don't think I've ever heard anyone use it before.

[arrogantalloy]

I fit my robes.

[Because Bruce fixed them.]

[savviest]

Congratulations, you are now a competent student. Go forth, my lad. Let education be your mistress.

[arrogantalloy]

You know. You talk cool.

[notsoradical]

im sorry.
im thirteen but my robes are big.
is there a spell to fix them, sir?
im not really good at them. :[
and i dont want you to be mad.
im sorry.

[savviest]

The more you apologise the less convinced I am that you're being entirely sincere.

There is a spell! Yes! Such brilliance and innovation! Magic in a magic school? Unheard of.

C'mere and I'll fix em.

[Inkblots..]

You do have other clothing. Don't you?

[ficklefuckwit]

Does it count if ive just turned twelve today?

[savviest]

I imagine so.

Congratulations, lad! You are now a boy child! Your eyes are ablaze with youth and stupidity and nothing shall ever take that from you until you turn thirteen!

[ficklefuckwit]

Though i suppose i havent really got much of worth to mention.

But certainly nothing will take my blaze of youth and stupidity. Probably not for long after ive turned fourteen! Because thats when people really start to grow up ive noticed.

[smackmybitchup]

Ahaha, man no way, are you seriously quitting? Getting all proper sulky like that and quitting?!

[savviest]

Yes! I am seriously quitting and I posted this very serious letter of resignation over the journals for everybody to gawp at.

How old are you? Two? Three?

[smackmybitchup]

I'm the shining example of a sixteen, almost seventeen year old stallion.

And by stallion I mean fit human being.

[marshall_lee]

I'm still well over eleven Sir. I think the castle is being ridiculous again.

..some things never change.

[savviest]

You. Good. I like you. Over eleven is a damn good number. I've been over it nearly four times and it keeps getting better.

filtered to him.

[marshall_lee]

I've been over eleven around..Hmm...17 times now?

I suppose it gets better for humans. For vampires it can suck. No pun intended.

[brohoof]

I know, right? I thought this place was for big kids, not babies. But all of a sudden there's like a million little boogers running around. I don't even know where they came from! It's really weird.

Also you talk weird. Like, I know you're British any everything, but you still talk a lot weirder than anyone I've met so far. It's like nothing can be normal in this place.

Not trying to be mean or anything, sir.

[savviest]

That is precisely what I mean, lad. Finally someone who isn't acting as if my REaction is an OVERreaction. It's very bloody weird, I'll have none of it!

Actually, no. I talk normally. Everyone else you've ever heard has been speaking wrong this entire time.

I'm wounded and I may never recover.

[brohoof]

We need to do something about it. I mean, kids aren't all bad, but they're gonna get in the way! I can't learn magic with babies running around and drooling on things. This is not what I signed up for!

Uh.

Are you serious, or are you just kidding?

[thesmallesttrickster]

Are you sure you want to quit, sir? It would be very sad to lose you over a small magical hiccup such as this.

[savviest]

That depends entirely on whether it is either permanent or a reoccurring hiccup. I knew a man who DIED of hiccups once, I could very well die of this. I can see it now, actually.

[thrownout]

How can you quit if stay in your office?

[savviest]

NOWHERE in my contract was I told that I had to LEAVE the building after quitting. I shall take my leave when I am good and ready.

I'll see you at dinner, shall I?

[thrownout]

How will you earn money if you don't have a job?

Where do we eat dinner?