Rose Lalonde (
thornsofoglogoth) wrote in
sortinghat_rp2012-03-18 12:22 pm
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❀ oo5:: Maternal love.
Good morning, all. I do believe I've just experienced karmic retribution.
Consider this a thinly veiled tribute and public service announcement: my darling mother is, in fact, somewhere in the vicinity of this castle.
I woke up to several My Little Unicorn dolls and three wizened statues of Albus Dumbledore hobnobbing on my bedside table - as well as two bottles of Old Ogden's Firewhisky which I have surrendered to the appropriate authorities.
Mother, come out, come out, wherever you are. I haven't quite thanked you properly for the gifts and veritable flood of letters I experience every weekend. May we shower each other with familial gestures of kindness all day and may I revel in your maternal charms this fine mothering Sunday.
Everyone, meet my mother, whom I love unconditionally.
Someone, anyone, please kill me now.
Consider this a thinly veiled tribute and public service announcement: my darling mother is, in fact, somewhere in the vicinity of this castle.
I woke up to several My Little Unicorn dolls and three wizened statues of Albus Dumbledore hobnobbing on my bedside table - as well as two bottles of Old Ogden's Firewhisky which I have surrendered to the appropriate authorities.
Mother, come out, come out, wherever you are. I haven't quite thanked you properly for the gifts and veritable flood of letters I experience every weekend. May we shower each other with familial gestures of kindness all day and may I revel in your maternal charms this fine mothering Sunday.
Everyone, meet my mother, whom I love unconditionally.
Private
he is the master of irony
but theres only so ironic you can get about sipping vodka from the nipples of a classy dame
pretty much his words
Private
Initially I thought he was feigning interest by being intentionally lewd to derail my attempts at evading certain topics, but I would suggest his unconventional approach and slightly defensive tactics hint at something a little more serious than mere infatuation, but I don't entirely know his habits well enough and this is based on a merely prefatory study.
On the other hand, he seems to have flipped the fuck out when I inadvertently compared the two of them.
I must admit myself entirely baffled.
I'm sorry, Dave.
Private
that you cant get a good read on bro
i told you lalonde 80 percent of what he says is horseshit
or are you sorry that he subjected me to a tender description of your moms booze lactating nipples
because yeah i will accept that apology
wait you mean he flipped the fuck out on you??
come to think of it he reacted pretty strongly when i said you were all over me
something is definitely rotten here