[06]

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

sO, uH,
eASTER BREAK WASN'T A TOTAL,
hORRIBLE AND HUMILIATING EXPERIENCE,
bECAUSE, sOMETHING GOOD DEFINITELY CAME FROM IT,
aLSO SOMETHING THAT TOOK A LOT OF PROCESSING,
bECAUSE, uH, iT WAS A HUGE SURPRISE,
aND ONE THAT, i WASN'T EXPECTING AT ALL,
bUUUT, iT TURNS OUT i AM, nOT QUITE SO MUCH OF AN ONLY CHILD,
aS WAS PREVIOUSLY, tHOUGHT,
wHICH IS TO SAY, i HAVE A BROTHER,
iSN'T THAT REALLY EXCITING,
i WAS REALLY SURPRISED AT FIRST,
bUT NOW, i THINK IT'S REALLY COOL,
aND, tHE BEST PART IS HE WORKS HERE,
aS THE FLYING TEACHER,
uHHH, tHE ONE NOT, rELATED TO A CERTAIN SUPPOSEDLY COOL GUY,
wHO WEARS SHADES,
aND LIKES TO, uH, mAKE FUN OF FAIRIES,
yEEEAH, hE'S THE OTHER, aCTUAL COOL ONE,

[Filtered to Kanaya; hackable by Equius]

hEYYY, uH,
i HAVE A REQUEST,
aND, iT MIGHT SOUNDS KIND OF, rANDOM AND STRANGE,
bUT i PROMISE THAT IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE,
a REALLY, gOOD CAUSE,
i NEED YOU TO MAKE ME A DRESS,
uHH, wELL,
iT'S NOT FOR ME, eXACTLY,
bUT ANYWAY, dO YOU THINK THAT, mAYBE YOU COULD DO THIS FOR ME,
i WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT,
tHE ONLY THING IS THAT, iT HAS TO BE PRETTY,
uHHH, pRETTY ENOUGH FOR A PRINCESS,
iF THAT IS A THING YOU CAN DO,
wHICH, i THINK YOU CAN, bECAUSE YOU'RE GOOD AT BEING PRETTY,
oHHH, aND MAYBE YOU COULD MAKE ME, a PAIR OF WINGS,
tO ATTACH TO MY PETER PAN COSTUME,
sO i CAN BE A FAIRY, }:)

Comments

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[He let out a small sigh. He still felt like it was his fault, but if Karkat insisted that it wasn't, he didn't want to argue. Instead, he guessed he would just move on to the Feferi situation. Even though he... didn't know what to even say.]

I...I think if, she... didn't want i-it, she would've been m-mad and, said no... So, uh, I don't think it's your, fault or anything. [As he spoke, he realized his words were only making him feel guiltier because they were going to break up. Oh god, he felt so bad. He didn't know what else to say though, because he didn't want Karkat to feel bad over something that wasn't true! Even if it made Tavros feel so guilty.]

Action

[selfhatred]

[He still didn't know about that. Sometimes Feferi was too nice. She mightn't have been able to find the words to shoot him down. He crossed his arms a little, leaning back against the table.]

Either way it's not your fault. [He paled a little as a sudden thought occurred to him.] Shit. Ampora's gonna kill me.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[At Karkat's statement, ice flooded Tavros's stomach. Oh god, he... he hadn't thought about that. And if he'd been comforted by Karkat telling him it still wasn't his fault, that went out the window.]

O-Oh...I, didn't... I-I didn't think, about that. [He drew in a shaky breath. Because the more he thought about it...the more he felt, a little protective, like... he didn't want anything like that to happen to Karkat. It kind of bubbled up in him in weird, confusing ways. He ended up speaking before he could stop himself.]

N-No... Uh, I won't, let him do that..

Action

[selfhatred]

If he wasn't going to kill me for calling Fef my girlfriend he's definitely going to kill me now for dumping her.

[Karkat ran a hand through his hair, swearing under his breath. Eridan wouldn't let him go quietly for this. The Slytherin would keep hounding him about it until either they dueled or something happened. His head snapped up a little at Tavros's words, staring at him before shaking his head.]

Don't. I'd hate myself if you got hurt. Y'know, more than usual. Hate myself, I mean. [He rubbed the bridge of his nose.] I'll deal with Eridan.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[Tavros let out a small sigh of frustration and fear. Why did this have to be so complicated? Why couldn't it just be easy... why couldn't they just work on not being confused, why did there have to be other things to worry about? Why was everything just so hard?]

But, w-we're... [the word stuck in his throat, but he forced it out,] t-t-together... Wh-which means, I mean, I think...it means, we're supposed to, help each other a-and... stuff.

Action

[selfhatred]

[He blinked at the other boy before a small smile flickered and he let out a 'heh'. Karkat leaned away from the table, rubbing the back of his neck.]

Here I am, the so-called relationships expert, and I keep forgetting it's a two way street.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[A brighter shade of red creeped across Tav's face at Karkat's statement. He'd. called it a relationship. He'd actually, finally, verbally confirmed that... it was a thing... Which did so many funny things to Tavros's stomach. Up until then, it had all been vague. Together could've meant a lot of things. But. He'd called it a relationship. And... and Tavros wasn't entirely sure how to feel about that.

But what he was feeling wasn't... bad. He was scared, but... but being with Karkat made it easier, and less scary. So much less scary. Surprisingly less scary. And even though he was scared, he... he was starting to feel happy. And relieved. And did he mention happy? Because happiness was definitely welling up inside of him. He couldn't help but smile a little, face absolutely red.

He wanted to speak, to say something, but he didn't even know what to say. He just stared up at Karkat, telling him with his eyes that he was definitely there, and that... that they could do this, together.]

Action

[selfhatred]

[Karkat still wasn't exactly sure about what this thing was, but calling it a relationship seemed to be...appropriate. It seemed right at least. He wondered a little bit if he was being a bad person with Feferi but he was honestly confused. He'd never had anyone to really show him how a relationship worked and even then he knew all relationships weren't like what happened in romcoms.

So what if it turned out he was gay? Was that really going to hurt anyone? He didn't think it would at least. There was still so much he didn't know about everything to do with having relationships with people, but he was a teenager. It was pretty much law that he was allowed to experiment, right?

Right?

When Tavros looked up at him, his stomach flipped, rotating with nausea all of a sudden. But a...good kind of nausea? It was hard to explain really. He let a small smile quirk, a little on the shy and unsure side. This was going to be strange but it was something they could do...together.

That seemed okay.]

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[Tavros just kind of stared at him for a few long seconds, that weird feeling in his stomach not going away. All things considered, he felt a lot better than he'd had earlier. Looking Karkat in the face, knowing they were in this together, it was just... very comforting.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he was aware that he kind of... wanted to- no, oh god, no he didn't have the courage to do that. It was way too scary. He decided to just push that thought to the furthest reaches of his brain. He hadn't leaned in a little or anything.

Except yes, he had a little. But he pulled back, face flushed.]

S-So...homework...?

Action

[selfhatred]

[He noticed Tavros lean forward a little but didn't say anything about it, rather just kind of blinking. He didn't know what to do. Should he lean in? But Tavros pulled back before he could and he rubbed the back of his neck a little awkwardly.]

Oh...yeah, that shit.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[Swallowing, trying to push it completely from his mind, everything, really, he reached back for his bag and put it back in his lap. Yes, now that that was all over, he could definitely help Karkat with his homework. No trouble at all.

Finally he found the essay he'd written, and handed it to Karkat.]

Uh, like I said you can, use it as a reference...

Action

[selfhatred]

[It felt kind of awkward, but that would probably pass. Now that they'd kind of recovered from that, it was a bit more easy to relax around the Hufflepuff. Karkat reached for the essay, hesitating a little.]

You're not worried about getting into trouble?

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[Tavros hesitated, shifting a little.] Consider it, um...p-practice, for... k-keeping other, stuff, secret... Since, I need the practice, and... you, need the essay... So we, uh, both also help each other, with this... If that, even makes any sense.

Action

[selfhatred]

[Smiling wasn't something Karkat did very often. He usually hid behind a wall of anger and hate that he projected at the world and denied it was at himself. But he was doing it now, a slightly bigger, more genuine smile than the one before as he took hold of the essay and leaned down slightly, letting his lips brush the other boy's cheek to whisper in his ear.]

Deal.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[There was no logical reason in Tavros's mind to explain just why his mouth went dry like that, when Karkat smiled and brushed his lips against his cheek. It didn't make sense. But he only let out a breathy little laugh when Karkat whispered in his ear, and he tried to ignore how weird but good it felt. Because it just... wow, it didn't make sense.]

Hehe... yeah, uh... [He swallowed.] W-Was there, anything else that, I can help w-with?

Action

[selfhatred]

[He had no reason to have done that, but it seemed...right? The other boy's laugh made his stomach do a tumble in a good way, so it had to be right. He pulled back, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked down at the essay...holy cow it was long.]

Nah. I...think this will be all I need. Thanks, man.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[To say that Tavros wasn't disappointed at least a little bit would be a lie. He'd hoped Karkat might need more help, so that he had an excuse to stay. He didn't want to be alone, at that moment in time, but... If Karkat didn't need him, he was afraid to be a bother.]

Should... Uh, I go, then, so you can concentrate, and, I'm not... in the way? [His tone probably gave away the fact he really wanted to stay, and he turned a little red. Again. And his face would probably just eventually say to hell with it and stay that way forever as a preemptive measure.]

Action

[selfhatred]

[Oh god. That was the wrong thing to say and Karkat knew it the instant he saw the look on Tavros's face. What were they even? He didn't know. They weren't quite...was boyfriends the right word? Holy cow, how did he do this thing? He bit his bottom lip, chewing it for a second as he looked away, a small flush of red staining his own cheeks.]

No. You can...you can stay, bro.

Action

[i_bullieve_i_can_fly]

[Tavros... wasn't even really thinking about any of that. Well, okay, he was, sort of. He just... knew he didn't want to be alone, because he would be scared. He wasn't really letting himself think more about it than that. It was easier if he just focused on the fact that being with Karkat was a really, really big comfort in and of itself.

So a smile broke back across his face, relieved and happy, when Karkat said that.]

O-Okay! Thanks... Uh... I guess, I can work on my, potions homework, or something... We can just, uh, do our homework together... That, sounds like it would be fun, I think...

Action

[selfhatred]

Sure.

[Karkat's lips lifted a little before he shrugged, finding his seat at the table again and sitting down, examining the other boy's essay. He wasn't any good at writing essays at all, even when he only had a couple of paragraphs to do.]