TEN ♋

[selfhatred]

WE HAVE A DANCE COMING UP.
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, BOYS AND GIRLS.
THE MATCHMAKER IS BACK IN ACTION.
DON'T HAVE A DATE OR YOU'RE TOO FUCKING PUSSY TO FIND ONE YOURSELF?
JUST LET ME TAKE CARE OF EVERYTHING.
NEED ADVICE BECAUSE YOU'RE A WORTHLESS SACK OF SHIT WHEN IT COMES TO RELATIONSHIPS?
I'M YOUR GUY.
YOU BULGE SUCKERS WOULDN'T KNOW ROMANCE FROM THE BROADSIDE OF A BARN SO IT'S UP TO ME TO SCHOOLFEED YOU LOT.
FUCK WHEN DID I START SAYING YOU LOT? I'M NOT FUCKING ENGLISH.

Comments

[mo_cara]

aIn'T nObOdY gOiNg WiTh ThIs MoThErFuCkEr.
I tHiNk ThAt'S pRoBaBlY eAsIeR, tHoUgH.
wHo YoU tAkIn, BeSt FrIeNd?

[selfhatred]

[Oh. Shit. Uh.]

I'M NOT SURE, BRO.
I'M NOT EVEN SURE THAT WHO I HAVE IN MIND WILL WANT TO GO WITH ME.

[mo_cara]

I bEt ThEy MoThErFuCkIn WiLl!
YoU aLwAyS wOrRy ToO mUcH aBoUt ThAt ShIt. ;o)
WhO's AlL uP iN yOuR pAn FoR tHiS?

[selfhatred]

[And suddenly grey ink splooge all over the page. The writing that comes through is white and gets filled as soon as it's written.]

SHIT, I JUST SPILLED ALL MY INK.
WE'LL TALK LATER, OKAY, MAN?

[mo_cara]

yEaH, mOtHeRfUcKeR, hIt Me Up AfTeR pOtIoNs!