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[rule_britannia]

It isn't normal for a stuffed snake to suddenly animate and attempt to crush your siblings, is it?

I'm rather sure I didn't make it do that.

[The above is scrawled out and messily cross-hatched over after this conversation, though still readable for anyone who's curious enough]

[Filtered to Alfred F. Jones]
I AM GOING TO MURDER YOU.

Comments

[moveslikejaeger]

yeah
so that was the snake alfred sent you huh?

[rule_britannia]

That's the one.

[Private Filter]
I can't believe he was so sodding stupid.
Or that I was, actually.
What was I thinking writing this?

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

he just wanted to be your hero sweety
i think it was very smart of him he cant fight your brothers head on like im sure hed like to so he found a way to do it indirectly
he didnt mean to get you in trouble

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

I don't need a bloody hero.
Least of all him.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

whats wrong with having a hero? you dont have to need one for it to be nice to have someone on your side
furthermore whats wrong with alfred? i know he kind of picks on you but he wouldnt do it if he didnt like you

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

There's nothing wrong wi I'm not some damsel in distress.

I can't even tell you how many things are wrong with what you just said. We're not little kids anymore, and he can't just pretend that his being a constant thorn in my side for the past five years didn't happen because he wants to make nice now.

For all I know this is just a set up, anyway.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

boys can be in distress too it just doesnt have the same ring to it

hes not doing that and you know it
it happened and he cant change that but that doesnt mean he cant change
how he looks at you cant change
five years is a long time to know someone

hed be putting an awful lot of effort for something with so little payout if it was a set up
and while i dont expect you to trust me i know that its not

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

It isn't t You can't hones He's j

[You're right, Maxim, he doesn't trust you, but he can't deny that you're right]

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

just think about it ;)<3

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

You have no idea how much I'd rather not.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

dont hide from your emotions be a man and face it head on

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

I'm not hiding from anything.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

sweety avoiding thinking about things you dont like is hiding

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

Jesus, don't call me 'sweety' you sound like my mother.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

no way i told victoria i call you that i cant lie to her now

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

Why would you tell her that?

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

well i called her sweety and she was like do you call arthur that and i was like sure i call everyone that
which is true

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

I swear she cannot keep me out of any of her conversations.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

to be fair i mentioned you first because she was skeptical about the quality of my friendship

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

I'm failing to see how I could come up in connection with that.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

you dont hate me!

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

I suppose not, but I don't really know you.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

well im friends with alfred does that count? we tell each other our deepest darkest secrets
thats how i know hes not setting you up
because he told me you make his heart pound and emotions soar

[filter]

[rule_britannia]

You're giving me so many reasons not to trust you right now.
You really have no idea.

[filter]

[moveslikejaeger]

but its truuuuuuuuuuu~~~ he totally <3s you! he thinks your the cutest and he wants to hold you to his manly chest while wind blows through your hair and waves crash behind and there are fireworks
thats how much he digs you