Dave Strider (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
clockspinner) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
sortinghat_rp2012-03-18 04:57 am
clockspinner) wrote in sortinghat_rp2012-03-18 04:57 am
Entry tags:
Two Sick Beats
[It's....technically Sunday. And yes, the timestamp is in fact completely accurate. 0457 GMT.]
WHERE IS HE?
BRO I FUCKING KNOW YOURE SOMEWHERE IN THIS FUCKING CASTLE
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK YOURE DOING HERE
OR HOW THE FUCK YOU GOT IN OUR ROOM
BUT I KNOW YOURE HERE SOMEWHERE AND I WILL FIND YOU
[Karkat and John (as well as most of Gryffindor Tower) just got the rudest awakening of the year. Namely, Dave screaming like the star in an exorcism movie and flailing out from under a massive, multicoloured pile of his brother's signature smuppets. Y u p.
Happy Parent's Day, everyone!]
WHERE IS HE?
BRO I FUCKING KNOW YOURE SOMEWHERE IN THIS FUCKING CASTLE
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK YOURE DOING HERE
OR HOW THE FUCK YOU GOT IN OUR ROOM
BUT I KNOW YOURE HERE SOMEWHERE AND I WILL FIND YOU
[Karkat and John (as well as most of Gryffindor Tower) just got the rudest awakening of the year. Namely, Dave screaming like the star in an exorcism movie and flailing out from under a massive, multicoloured pile of his brother's signature smuppets. Y u p.
Happy Parent's Day, everyone!]
Private
this isnt like baby mama drama is it.
and no wonder it didnt work out.
cars and cats just dont work out chica.
they get bitchy and then suddenly that upholstery you spent all your savings on
you know the fineass leather.
its shredded.
and all your dreams are dead.
you have no idea how wonderful it is to know im better than your ex cat.
truly my heart is touched.
and now youre giving me whiplash with these mood swings.
you dont want dirt on dave
yet you wanna see his baby pics.
make up your fucking mind.
Private
i do not want to hear about who dave likes or if he sleeps with a teddy gosh
Private
Private
[That actually shocked her into laughing.]
oh nooooooo!!!!! he hasnt, i goofed up!!
Private
but tell you what ill cut you some slack.
dave and his teddy bear can be our little secret.
so what the fuck are you two a couple or something.
hes real god damn protective of you its like jesus christ christ on the shitter.
kid actually grew a pair and tried to lay down the law.
told me not to scare you off.
so.
sup with that.
Private
ohhhh no no no no no no no no no no!!!
we are just very good friends!!!!
i am sure that dave has a bunch of candidates for coupling beating down his door already
he is just that cool
Private
he ever had a girlfriend around here.
i mean i know lady killers run in the family but shit.
i think it skipped a generation.
Private
but that was not my point!
i think he is just worried that you would scare me because of your persistent big dealness
but
he is probably more interested in rose
they complement each other nicely in sarcastic douchebaggery
Private
ha ha ha.
thats funny.
you think hes interested in lalonde.
aint no fucking way hes getting in her pants.
dont ask why.
its because i said so thats why.
Private
anyone besides me
i suspect he might think i have the crabbypants taint on me after karkat
Private
man you gotta quit that.
i mean striders like em easy like the next guy but its confidence that really gets us going.
though if youre saying you have crabs then yeah
fuck that shit.
Private
wanting what makes your friends the happiest is not low self esteem
if it is me then that is great!!
but i will consider other options first
i am not VAIN
not those crabs either, i do not even like crab
Private
they make pills for those mood swings seriously
you really should look into them.
chica i dont think anyone likes crotch crabs okay.
youre not special.
these feelings are not unique.
Private
not so much on the pills suggestion, though
do we really have to carry on the crabs tangent???
Private
itll meet its demise in a few seconds.
then we can have it for dinner.
so you gonna go kiss the guy or what.
Private
you will see